I hung out on the dock with a few friends yesterday and had a very animated conversation with some. I found myself talking about the new life I experienced after I abandoned complaining.

Weeks ago, I found that I only communicated with family and friends when something came up that led to complaints. I checked myself and asked why I did this regularly. I knew the pattern had to change. It made me feel miserable even though I got commiseration for my miseries. I didn’t particularly appreciate spreading gloom and doom to people I love.

Was it my need for appreciation that prodded this action? People appreciate me, but somehow, it wasn’t enough. The demand was more profound. The self clamored for more. Am I this needy?

I didn’t like what I was finding of myself. I didn’t want to think about it. I wanted to let it go away or bury it somewhere. The awareness wouldn’t go away. It confronted me. I had no choice but to face it and listen to it.

First, I had to admit how much I wanted to be appreciated. It’s natural, and there’s nothing wrong with it. It is a part of me that I need to give attention to, know more about, and befriend.

Next, I tried to remember the incidents in the past when I felt hurt because I was not appreciated. I can look at those incidents now and, with my present understanding, can accept them without breaking. I am wiser and stronger now than when those incidents happened. I let these go never again to bother me.

Inside, I felt lighter and happier. I started enjoying the things and people that in the past made me complain. My days changed. Now, I anticipate with joy whatever the day brings. I believe that my day will work out well, and it always does. There’s no more strain, only enjoyment.

I found I have more than enough energy. I have time even to sit down and be happy. Yes, I am doing much more with time to rest. I have become relaxed and can enjoy company and events with more energy than I ever had.

So, come and join me on the dock. I don’t know what surprises will delight us.